Interesting.

I have a Twitter account only to win free give-aways through blogs, but I logged on this week to read the feed.  And every time I opened my Facebook, the News Feed was full of arguing and joking about Osama Bin Laden.  The dialogue (and implications of said words) interest me, and it raises the constant questions nagging my brain and heart about justice.  What is it?  When someone does something terrible that causes pain and the end of life for one (or many in the case of September 11th, which America coincides often with Bin Laden and his death), and justice is "served" through that person's own death, is the right reaction celebration?

By voicing these questions, I am neither affirming his death as the "right" thing or condemning it as "wrong."  My pacifist leanings (which apply generally to the death penalty and war, etc.) go into a chaotic frenzy over an occurrence like this one.  Bin Laden's death raises more questions in my mind than provides answers.  The biggest wondering I have is this:  Did the murder of one man vindicate the lost lives of thousands?  I have a twisted knot in my stomach, because, to me, it does not seem like death in any form redeems what was lost.  I know this is all very idealistic, and my heart breaks at the lack of justice in our world... for the countless hurting, lost, and broken individuals that we deem so often as "beyond repair" and "deserving" of punishment.  I am not saying Bin Laden deserved a break or should have escaped any form of consequence or retribution (including death, again I don't know what I think about it...), but I am saying that my heart longs to believe, has to believe that his soul was not beyond redemption and transformation through grace when he died.  I think the knot in my stomach goes beyond Osama Bin Laden's death and stems from my own sin and filth.  If Bin Laden is beyond redemption, then aren't I beyond redemption, too?  I long for a time and a world where justice is restorative and beautiful, and we speak of it not with sword and battle allegory but words of understanding, forgiveness, and peace.  Justice consumed with grace and motivated by love.

These are the times I wish I could have a sit-down with God and throw my heart at him and cry.  But I know he cries, too, maybe not for the same reasons as me, but for lives and souls lost to violence and hate.

To Mom

In honor of my great mom, I dedicate an entire post to her.  She's incredible, and I am thankful to have a woman for a mother who is caring, dedicated, thoughtful, and generous.  Don't get me wrong; we could not be more different-I suppose this is one of the bi-products of adoption-but our differences have moved from sources of tension in the past to qualities that strengthen and beautify our relationship now.  Here I go:  the top five reasons I love my mom!

(All the Girls:  Me, Mom, and Erica)

1.  She's determined - My mom wanted to be a teacher but did not have the degree, so she went to school, worked full time, and went to all of our events, performances, etc. simultaneously.  Despite the hecticness of the situation, she received her degree during my junior year of college an fulfilled her goal:  to finish college before I did :).

2.  She's Creative - Mom is a creative person, always thinking up new ideas or ways to do things.  She loves to share this gift with others and teach them how to do crafts\ or give away her projects.

3.  She Believes with Faith - My mom and I see God in a different way and approach our relationships with him differently as well, but she shared her faith with me in a young age and gave me a priceless gift.  She believes easily and without restraint, and I really admire this in her.

4.  She's Thoughtful - Mom sees importance in little things and uses even the smallest opportunity to make someone's day a little brighter.  She goes "above and beyond" to make someone happy.

5.  She's Professional - Mom works hard and does her best consistently.  She never stayed at home with us but strove for balance between her professional duties and family responsibilities.  I don't feel that I was neglected or deprived, because she worked, and I feel I have been taught a valuable lesson and given a great example of being a "career mom."  I don't think it's wrong to stay at home with the kids, and I don't think it's wrong to be a working mom either.  At this point I think I want the later, so it's nice to know that it can be done and the kids don't turn out too weird :).

Happy Mother's Day, Mom!  I love you!

"... while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." -Romans 5:8

This is my highest inspiration, my everlasting hope, and my dearest truth.  Christ is risen, he is risen indeed.  Celebrate, it's Easter!

Last night while sitting in a Tenebrae service in commemoration of Good Friday, I couldn't focus.  My mind wandered to my craving for chocolate, the presence of my ex-boyfriend, the clashing colors in my outfit, the bicycle I saw on Craigslist, the church's location and how it would be awfully far away if we had to live in the neighborhood, my friend, the memory of the first time I saw the Passion of the Christ film, the decision to go to Kenya or not go to Kenya, the quality of the worship music (and how it was much better than my church's), the sleepy feeling in my body, the meeting I had with my mentor the following morning, etc., etc., etc...

By the extinguishing of the fifth candle, I realized that my heart was far way, so very far away.  So very removed from the place my heart ought to have been, where I thought it was going to be walking into the sanctuary.  So very alone.  Every time I tried to quiet my mind and reel it back toward the service, it wandered.  Finally, I gave up and sat helpless and left to my own devices.

And then I wondered if, years ago, this was how God and Jesus felt that night.  Helpless, removed from love and light, and nowhere near where they desired to be, where they ought to be...  Maybe it's good to be on the brink sometimes. Especially with the graceful knowledge that he gave all but rose again.

Where's a Pensieve When You Need One?

This is an update.  I'm at the end of the Harry Potter series.  And I'm eager (Will my questions be answered, or will this be another Lost experience?), anxious (Who will it be, Harry or Voldemort?), excited (I understand references to Harry Potter and contribute to the conversation intelligibly:  "Oh yeah, she's about as emotionally-stable as Cho!"), and sad (I don't want this series to end, and Hogwarts isn't real-side caveat-I understand why kids were depressed with the knowledge that they couldn't go to Harry's world, and platform 9 and 3/4 was very stony and hard indeed.).

(This could be me if I am not careful:  An old cat lady who lives inside her imagination... and consumes macaroni and cheese and fruit cocktail to sustain herself.  Friends-this is my warning, if you feel I need an intervention, please proceed quickly and painlessly.)

So, all this blogging about Harry will soon be complete, and I can resume normal, adult life... or not.  I purchased Harry Potter magnetic poetry for our new apartment.  We all need a little frivolous fun, right?  And to anyone who believes legitimately that the Twilight series could take down Harry Potter in a duel, you are mistaken sorely, my Friend.  And I suggest you get yourself a decent wand and learn a stunning charm, because you'll be needing them.  But all this leisurely reading makes me crave one thing:  Accio Summer!

The Stinkbugs

(Oh to be young, untainted, and full of curious wonder!  And entertained easily by the pigeon strolling on the sidewalk.)

Sometimes their cuteness is overwhelmingly vomit-inducing... which is why being a nanny is the best form of birth-control known to humans.  But I adore them for real, and we're working on getting my name down.  And I couldn't be more thankful for a hilarious boss who says great things like, "I don't care what he's packing in his pants, so long as he's good to everyone," "it's back to the bacon this week!" (in reference to the low-carb diet), and my favorite, "In the therapy world, some people are like onions-smelly but manageable-but some are like garlic-once they're cracked, there's no turning back-and those are the ones to watch out for."

These days the good, old nine-to-five isn't that bad.  And I believe this more and more, one of our hardest-but most important-tasks in growing up is to stay young.

Malaria.

I am studying malaria-it's affects on economies, ecosystems, political systems, and communities-in Sub-Saharan Africa through two organizations, Malaria No More and the ONE campaign.  For homework this week, I wrote an op/ed piece about the use of DDT to eliminate malaria through house-spraying.  If you're interested, take a peek, and raise your awareness on April 25th for World Malaria Day!

The Deadlier of the Two

By Ashlee Morris

In Ghana a village, Berekuso, fights against malaria.  With educational training and mosquito nets, the villagers are protecting themselves against this devastating disease; however, more is necessary.  Employing other resources—like Internal-Residual Spraying composed of Dichloro-diphenyl-trichloroethane (commonly known as DDT)—could eliminate malaria completely from Berekuso.

                       

Chemist Paul Hermann Müller discovered DDT was a safe insecticide in small, diluted doses in 1874.  In the 1940s military units utilized DDT to eliminate diseases, like typhoid, threatening soldiers and civilians.  By the late 1940s, malaria was a significant, public-health problem in America.   The National Malaria Eradication program applied DDT treatments in homes to rid the country of mosquitoes carrying malaria, and the country was considered “malaria free” by 1949.

After the successful elimination of DDT in America, the Center for Disease Control (CDC) launched a similar movement to eradicate malaria internationally.  With the evaporation of funds, lack of community involvement, drug-resistance, and ban on DDT, the cause was dropped in the late 1970s.  Today malaria continues to wreak havoc.  781,000 individuals die of malaria annually, and 85 percent of those deaths belong to children under age five. 

Besides being a major, public health concern, malaria is a hindrance to economic, educational, and communal progress in the developing world.  Many resources are available to ease the burden.  Whole communities in Sub-Saharan Africa, like Berekuso, are educated about malaria, so it can be prevented, recognized, and treated properly.  Many families receive Long-Lasting insecticide treated nets.  A malaria vaccine, which is in the third trial phase, is being developed and tested on infants and children.  Artemisinin-based combination therapies are prescribed to individuals suffering from malaria for more effective treatment as well. 

Also communities utilize Internal-Residual Spraying (IRS) of insecticides indoors to kill mosquitoes.  IRS formulas composed of DDT, according to the World Health Organization (WHO), remain the most effective insecticide.  In 2006 WHO declared DDT, in the form of low-dose IRS, safe for use as a mosquito insecticide to eliminate malaria.  Shortly after WHO’s endorsement, the UN curbed DDT use against malaria.  WHO did not declare DDT unsafe; however, other methods, such as medicinal treatments for the uninfected, were endorsed instead. 

After Rachel Carson’s outcry in Silent Spring, scientific research declared that DDT harmed human health, destroyed agriculture, and disrupted whole ecosystems, and it was banned in 1972.  Contemporary research conveys that DDT use in the amounts necessary to wipe out disease-spreading insects, like malaria-carrying mosquitoes, does not threaten humans, animals, or crops.  House spraying with insecticides kills both the nesting mosquitoes and their eggs, making IRS an imperative move against future protection and complete malaria eradication.  In 2006 Arata Kochi, WHO’s malaria chief, stated that, “One of the best tools we have against malaria is indoor residual spraying. Of the dozen or so insecticides WHO has approved as safe for house spraying, the most effective is DDT.” 

While the UN’s rejection of DDT appeases environmentalists, it presents a huge roadblock to complete malaria eradication.  Concern about an insecticide’s adverse affects is legitimate, but if an insecticide is proven safe and affective against malaria, political correctness should be reconsidered.  Every 45 seconds a child dies from malaria, which means that, in the reading of this article, about five children die.  Lasting, negative side effects from DDT exposure are arguable, but the failure to apply every safe, affective resource known to end malaria could be considered irresponsible and narrow.  By encouraging the use of DDT in controlled, small doses, we protect entire families and communities from malaria and provide the hope of a malaria-free future.  Children should be allowed to grow up, and the use of DDT as an insecticide makes that a reality.    

DDT house spraying is not the only solution.  Further resources must be allocated for vaccine research and development.  Organizations and governments must work together to make anti-malarial drugs affordable and accessible as well.  Finally individuals affected by malaria must be educated and committed to ending malaria in their communities.  By joining efforts worldwide, we equip small villages, like Berekuso, to be the leaders of change in the fight against malaria.  With a perspective of long-term success and global understanding accepting of all safe methods of elimination, we can eradicate malaria.